Faisal in 10 years

Current physical condition:

172cm tall

66Kg

33 inch waist

Current eating habit:

Swine-like

Current exercising routine:

Non-existent

B.M.I:

22.31 (B.M.I: 25 and above = Overweight)

Past physical condition: (Circa 6 months ago)

172cm tall

58-60kg

31-32 inch waist

Past eating habit:

Fag like. Eating habit almost non-existent

Past exercising routine:

Jogging,everyday,half hour sessions.

B.M.I:

20.28

I gained 6 kilograms in 6 months. That would translate to 12 Kilograms a year. Multiply that by 10, you will get 120 Kilograms. If I continue with my current lifestyle, I will weigh approximately 180 Kilograms in ten years time. My B.M.I calculation would read a mind-boggling 60.84.

I am living dangerously here. All those teh tariks and late night maggie gorengs are finally taking it's toll on my weight. I can barely fit in my old clothes right now. Thank god I got a baff brother. He's lending me his clothes. I am Fat. Dammit.

I'm going have to buck up soon because if I dont, one day I will end up the one they call "the single fat one" everytime an unknown person asks their friend about me when they see me arriving all alone at weddings and other functions.

*gulp*

Faisal's a Racist

I was waiting for class to start when I read something on a whiteboard. It read something along the lines of:

"F*ck Malay Special Rights"

Should I reply that provoking statement with another equally provoking statement? Or should I just take the high road and walk away? Maybe I should just hit every Non-Malays I see to vent out my anger?

I walked away in disgust. I was sad, angry and disappointed.

The original architects of "Hak Istimewa Orang Melayu" never had the intention to make the special privileges given to the Malays a permanent one. In fact if I'm not mistaken, Tun Dr.Ismail Abdul Rahman, my political hero, said it deeply embarrassed him that the Malays needed special privileges.

I agree with the late Tun. I am also embarrassed by the fact that the special privileges given to the Malays still exist. It makes us look weak and incompetent. Mind you we are not a weak and incompetent. Look at Petronas for example. A company ran by Malays. It is a Fortune 500 company. It is one of the 100 largest companies in the world. As hard as it is for me to admit it, in my opinion, the Malays still need the special privileges.

The Malays were deprived of so many things when Malaya was under the rule of the British Empire. The Non-Malays were given freedom to open up businesses, set up their own educational institutes with their own educational systems. They were not harassed by the British. They lived a privilege existence under British rule for hundreds of years.

The Malays were however sidelined and banished to the interiors of Malaya. They were told to be farmers. They were poorly educated. The British made sure they were poorly educated because a smart and intelligent Malay race would surely oust them out of Malaya. They made sure we were stupid so that they can suck the resources from our country and use it for their own benefit. They made us feel weak and incompetent through a series of carefully planned schemes.

Here is an example of how the British treated the Malays. Ngah Ibrahim was a very rich Malay. He was a multi-millionaire who actually paid the salary of the then Sultan of Perak. He however committed a crime. His crime was to try oust the British from Perak. As a punishment for his crime, he was banished from Perak and Malaya. This is what happened to rich Malay Patriots.

The British first set foot on Malaysian soil in 1786. The Malays were sidelined, discriminated against and victimized by the British for over 200 years. During this time the Non-Malays were given absolute freedom to prosper and earn a living. It has been about 38 years since the Malays were given special privileges by the government.

Is 38 years of governmental aid enough to compensate 220 years of discrimination and victimization? In my opinion, the answer is no.

The special privileges for the Malays should not be called privileges. This is because they are in fact governmental aids given to a group of Malaysians that are still lagging behind the other races economically. You may argue that they are far more poorer Indians than Malays but look at it from a percentage point of view. There are more rich Indians than poor Indians. The same cannot be said about the Malays.

If you are indeed "colourblind" Why question the aids given to the Malays?

If you are indeed "colourblind" Why would it be so wrong to help the Malays?

I am not a racist. I have many Non-Malay friends who are dear to me. Some of my best friends are Non-Malay.

I am not against the government giving government aids to those who need them. What is so wrong about labelling a group of people that are at the receiving end of governmental aids? There is no such thing as a particular race being side-lined. No race is being dealt with unfairly. There is no such thing as the apartheid here in Malaysia.

Just because helping the Malays achieve economical power is a government agenda, people are labelling the government for practising apartheid. When was the last time you saw a sign saying "Malays only allowed to seat" in a bus? When was the last time you saw a signboard saying "Non-Malays are not allowed to contest in the general election"?.

Name me one race that has become poorer as a result of the new economic policy. I dare you.

Jam Patek Phillipe Ayah

My dad owns a Patek Phillipe. "You never really own a Patek Phillipe. You merely look after it for the next generation". That tagline says a lot about the quality and prestige of the swiss watchmaker.

We all know how much a Patek Phillipe watch is worth. For all those who dont know, a Patek Phillipe watch can cost hundreds of thousands of ringgit. You certainly will not get one for less than the price of an average family sedan. And I'm talking about foreign made family sedans. Not locally made ones.

However, my dad's Patek Phillipe costs Rm100. Yeap, its fake.

We're nowhere near poor but my dad could never afford a watch that costs the same as his children's education. All four of them. It aches me inside everytime any one of my siblings make fun of my dad's fake Patek Phillipe. I used to make fun of it myself in the past. But I am sure as hell that I will not make fun of it anymore.

Ayah has sacrificed a lot for his family. He never buys anything for himself. Not clothes, not perfumes, not watches not anything really.

Situation 1

"Ayah, kenapa ayah tak beli jam mahal sikit? Go la buy something for you, you work so hard, beli la something as a reward for yourself..baju ke...anything la, go splurgeeee, go buy something expensive for yourself"

"haha, ayah hang mana ada duit nak beli mahal mahal"

I joined him laughing.

"Ayah, aduh!!! Asal ayah pakai baju free pergi KLCC? Jom la we buy something nice for you. This time takyah nak beli yang ada 70% discount. Go get something you like. Sekali sekala beli baju mahal takpela"

"Haha, ayah hang mana ada duit nak beli mahal mahal"

Again, I joined him laughing.

"Ayah!! Raya kot! Tolonglaaaa beli baju lawa lawa sikit for yourself!! Mahal sikit takpela, setahun sekali"

''Haha, ayah hang mana ada duit nak beli mahal mahal"

This time instead of laughing along with him, I said to myself: "Ayah kedekut".

Situation 2

"Ayah, nak four thousand. Nak bayar tution fees"

"Ok, nanti ayah bagi"

"Ayah, angah nanti nak buat practical. Tak nak naik public transport. Ada kereta lagi senang angah nak ulang alik"

"Ok Faisal, nanti kita beli"

"Ayah, angah nak Gen 2, dalam thirty four thousand"

"Ok Faisal, nanti kita pergi book".

"Ayah nak duit beli baju, angah nak yang elok elok sikit"

"Ok Faisal, dua ratus cukup?"

"Ayah, angah dapat 3 pointer. Nak duit hadiah?"

"Ok Faisal, heres three hundred"

"Ayah, angah nak pergi PD dengan kawan kawan, Nak duit?"

"Ok Faisal, berapa ratus nak?"

"Ayah, angah nak beli something mahal sikit. Tak cukup duit. Nak duit?"

"Ok Faisal,berapa ratus hang tak cukup?".

My dad is asleep in his room while I'm outside in our "gazebo" ie a family area surrounded by ceiling high glass panes with an L shaped fish pond surrounding it. We tease my dad about calling the family area a gazebo because it is so obviously not one. When we tease him about calling it his gazebo, he'd go:

''Yela, ayah hang tak dak duit nak buat betul betul".

All of us would break into laughter. My dad would just smile.

That used to be funny. As I grew older making fun of my dad for owning a fake watch, wearing old clothes and being cheap in general suddenly wasnt funny anymore.

He couldve bought an expensive watch for himself instead of buying me (and my brother) a car. He could have sent all of us to public universities and not have to pay tens of thousands of ringgit in tuition fees every single year (My dad firmly belives MMU is the best, Well we are one of the best, we're the only private institution of higher learning in Malaysia that made it top 200 in Asia). He couldve used the hundreds of ringgits (perhaps thousands by now) he gave us to splurge and shop to buy things for himself.

But he didnt. Ayah has never complained about spending so much for us. Not even a sentence of complaint. Not even a word. Not even a sigh.

It never was "Ayah hang mana ada duit nak beli mahal mahal". It has always been "Ayah loves us more than Ayah loves himself ". What we want is more important to him than what he wants.

My dad is not cheap afterall. He does not spend on himself because he wants to save money. Not for himself, but for us. For our education. He wants to make sure we will live a good life in the future.

I'm going to get you a real Patek Phillipe one day.

Thanks dad. You Rock :).

Ada apa dengan Cinta? Part 2

Gadis D

Gadis D.

Taman Setiawangsa, Wilayah Persekutuan Kuala Lumpur.

Circa 2003

It was around 6pm. I was jogging with my brother around Bukit Setiawangsa. We had jogged for about 40 minutes and were about done. We were heading home to our old house @ Puncak Setiawangsa.We were new there. We had just moved from Taiping, Perak.

As we made our way up a hill, we saw a young lady, presumably our age jogging. She wore dark blue gym pants, a white T and a white cap to match. I was mesmerized. Well, not mesmerized per se but I did stop on my tracks.

My oh my was she cute.

The next morning I saw a familiar face. She was a prefect, and a senior. I spent the entire day busting my brains out trying to remember where I saw her before.

After a few agonizing hours, it struck me.

She was Gadis D I saw jogging yesterday! She wore a tudung to school you see, so that's why it didn't immediately hit me that she was Gadis D when I first saw her earlier.

About a year later, I became a prefect myself. I'd secretly curi curi pandang her when we had our weekly meetings. I'm really good with all this espionage thing. Not once did she catch me curi curi pandang her.

My first crush in the garden city of lights.

Today Gadis D has started working, she graduated about a year ago. We're friends now.

Gadis D was my last serious crush.

The crushes that happened after Gadis D evolved into relationships. Relationships that has now ended.

The difference between the crushes that you have just read about and the relationships after that is that the memories of the crushes that I had will always be sweet ones. Ones where I can think about and laugh at for years to come.

As for the relationships, I cannot laugh about them. There's nothing funny about being dumped or dumping someone.

Ada apa dengan Cinta? Part 1

Gadis A, Gadis B, Gadis C.

Gadis A.

Newcastle Upon Tyne, United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland

Circa 1993-1997

I think I was 5-6 years old when I first laid my eyes on Gadis A. She was sweet, kind and very cute. She was my classmate at Forest Hall Primary School.

During my 3 wonderful years at that school, I cant recall a single conversation I had with her. No guts I tell you. You see, I was horrified of girls. I cant talk to them. Especially the really cute ones (Up to this day this problem has not gone away completely, much to my embarrassment) .

Oh wait a minute..there was this one time she spoke to me. It was during the school assembly. She said sorry. I was sitting in front of her and she accidentally vomited on me.

She was part of the "popular' clique. Along with Lauren, whose grandparents lived in Paris and Rachel. I don't know much about Rachel except that she's pretty.

Gadis B.

Ipoh, Perak Darul Ridzuan.

1998-2000

It was a hot afternoon/evening-ish. I used to go to Puan Normah's house for tuition. It was a teeny weeny single story bungalow in the suburbs of Ipoh.

I first laid my eyes on Gadis B in a makeshift classroom at the back of Puan Normah's house. It had cement flooring, ugly as hell and smelled just as bad. Mosquitoes were everywhere.When I got there, gadis B was busy writing something. I remembered staring at her throughout the entire 2 hour class.

She had this soft girly look. She wasn't drop dead gorgeous, but she had this certain gadis ayu quality that just melted me. My first serious crush.

I went back home that day thinking about her day and night. The following year she became my classmate. In true Faisal fashion, I hardly spoke to her.

It's a small world. She's studying in MMU now. She looked a lot like she did the last time I saw her. Which was about ten years ago.

Gadis C

Taiping, Perak Darul Ridzuan.

2001-2003

I met Gadis C at Puan Normalina's house. I used to go there for tuiton (Tuition centres are places where one can find love =D).

Gadis C was my first crush in Taiping. You know, when I think about it..I think she had the hots for me too...

I used to message her a lot. I'm not so sure about phone calls, my memory isn't that good but I'm pretty confident that we did call each other a few times. She's smart and pretty.

Basically she's sugar spice and everything nice. Perfect candidate right? WRONG.

Her dad. Her dad is the WRONG in WRONG. Extremely garang. That guy freaked me out and scared me shitless.

One fateful day, my Nokia 3310 rang. "she" was calling me out of the blue. I picked up happily thinking that she wanted to bergayut with me. Instead of her girlish voice, I heard a deep manly snarl on the other end of the line.

"SAPE NI????"

"er......." *gulp* (shit! It's her dad, what am I going to do??)

"SAPE NI????"

"er...." *double gulp**double shit*

"SIAPA INI?????????" *Help me god...*

By the third time he asked "SIAPA NI??", he lost it. He began shouting and cursing. I dont really remember what he said but it wasn't very pleasant. His parting words were:

"KAMU JANGAN KACAU NUMBER INI LAGI!"

Good god dude..you need to take a chill pill.

Well, that was practically the end of Gadis C's "adventure" with me. We met again a few times at Puan Nurmalina's house but I'm guessing her dad scares her shitless too. Because since the night of "SAPE NI????", there wasn't any more messages from her..no phone calls...no nothing.