Hero

What is a hero?

A person who wears his or hers underwear over his or her pants? A man in an iron suit? A God from Asgard? What is a hero?

I am 25 and unhappy. Unhappy I don't have enough money to get married. Unhappy that I'm not doing what I've always wanted to do and unhappy that everybody else seems so happy. Its not because I'm jealous. Its because unlike everybody else, I've made some pretty bad life choices. So therefore, fuck me. I am here ranting like a disgruntled wife who has not seen her husband for 2 years. I am here ranting because I have no idea what to do. Do I quit? Do I continue? Do I further my studies? Is it too late for me? All those questions are jumbled up in a poisonous cocktail of fuckedupness in my head. I need someone to save me.

I need a hero.

Okay I dont need a hero. I do realize that all I need is me. Yeap, me to turn my life into what I've always wanted it to be. Its easier said than done.

When at work I'll be too busy to think about this thing. When at home I'll be too tired to think about anything other than sleep. During the weekends I spend time with my family, love and friends so I'll be too busy not giving a fuck.

On Saturday I'll be "Oh well, at least it's Saturday. Fuck all my problems" than on Monday I'll be "Shit...should've done some soul searching/brainstorming over the weekend". Its a vicious cycle of which there is no end.

And alas, the 5 minutes I've given myself to write this has ended and this entry has been completely pointless.