Hopes and dreams: From a law student to a practicing lawyer

I first wrote in my blog somewhere in 2009, roughly 4 years ago. I was 21. Full of life, full of hopes and had a boatload of dreams. I made a promise to myself that I'd be a millionaire by the time I reached 25. People were skeptical but I wasn't, oh no. 4 years ago, the thought of 4 years in the future seemed so far away.

I was only into my 2nd year of law school, had no girlfriend and no car. All I had was my guitar which I bought using the money I earned working as a cashier at Parkson Grand after SPM. 

As a 21 year old dweeb, I saw me working in a huge firm with good pay and a side business that was making hundreds of thousands per year. I saw me as, this is rather embarrassing, a 25 year old multimillionaire driving a Ferrari.

Well, 4 years passed since and I am now 25.

My life isn't actually hell. I work in a sizable law firm and I earn what most 1st year lawyers earn but......I am nothing what the 21 year old me thought I'd be when I reached 25. To make matters worse, I don't even know whether practicing is for me or not. I have become disillusioned thanks to the long working hours, high stress rate and in my opinion low wages that does not commensurate with the amount of hours spent working.

So in a nutshell 1 of my 2 dreams is slowly becoming a nightmare.

It looks like I wont enjoy practicing after all.

Now I'm left with one and that is to become rich which actually puts me in a catch 22 situation because If I were to keep on chasing dream #1......then there is very little hope of ever achieving dream #2. 

So now I am in between a rock and a hard place.

At 21 I envisioned a 25 year old me to be a young lawyer well on his way to becoming a success story, enjoying my work, life and loving every day of it. At 25, I saw the 21 year old me as naive, foolish and somewhat void of logic. 

At a young age of 25 I am beginning to feel like I'm losing the game of life.

Shit.